Dear friend,
He said, “I have been very jealous for the LORD, the God of Armies; for the children of Israel have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword. I, even I only, am left; and they seek my life, to take it away.”
I've been sitting with this one instead of jumping to fix it, because I don't think it needs fixing tonight so much as naming. This stretch has you lonely. Not the dramatic kind, just the kind where you're in a room full of people or scrolling through a full phone of contacts and still feel like nobody would notice if you went quiet for a week. I know that particular flavor. Early in my marriage I lived two miles from my sister and felt more alone than I ever did living across the country from everyone. Proximity didn't touch it. I kept thinking something was wrong with me for feeling that way while surrounded. I don't think that anymore. I think it's just what it is sometimes, no tidy cause, no quick math to solve it. Elijah under the broom tree told God he was the only one left, and he wasn't, not even close, but that's not the point. The point is he said it out loud instead of performing fine. What does the loneliness feel like when it hits hardest, morning or night?
A prayer
God, she's lonely tonight in a way that's hard to explain to anyone who asks. You see the empty parts of her week that don't show up in conversation. Sit with her in it, even now.